thCAIWMSXB I need to put a disclaimer for the words you are about to read.  I do have dyslexia, but I do enjoy writing. If you are someone from my past,  this post is my way of letting you know my truth. Maybe you are ready to hear it.

This year has not been a good year for me at all.  This has been a year of  emotional pain. Where to start , well let me start with the loss of a wonderful crystal keeper in Bastrop ,Texas Lorraine was a woman who died earlier this year.  She died five months later after I have visited her crystal store.  She gifted me a very large size vogel crystal, it was the last one in her window.  A couple earlier put hundred dollars towards it for a quick body energy read I gave the wife.  So, Lorraine did not want to bother with payment plan on the crystal that was three hundred dollars. With her beautiful Wise woman smile she placed it in my hands and said, “You need to take it home with you.”  I could not believe that she was giving me her last large vogel in her store. I was so honored.  She said to me that I had a  lot of work I will be doing with it.  I remember getting into the car and thinking to myself, why does this feel like the last time I will see her, that feeling  hit me heavy in my heart.  Little did I know that it was truth. It was the last time I would see her.  I remember exactly where I was when I got the text that she had crossed over, I was in Elliott’s natural foods looking for something to calm my emotional nerves that I was hit with emotionally.

So, I am going to say it from my spirit point of view without the victim energy of claiming.  The emotional hit was the ending of a eleven year relationship best friend more like a sister to me. We were sisters, who shared half of each others name. I will not use her name in this blog, but if you are reading this, you know it is YOU.  I am so glad that the week before this relationship hit the cliff, I was just blessed with a beautiful healing energy technique from Creator.  Spiral Light therapy, goes into the cellular level of the womb of self, to remove the negative energy pattern that one keeps dealing with  in their life. Sometime these energy pattern can show up the same time of the year, and you don’t  know why you keep having the reactions. Some energy patterns are not yours to carry, it was given to you while you were in your mothers womb.  So, February 27th I got a letter from my so called Sister. Who sent me a seven page letter with a list of twenty things listing what is wrong with me.  Before  Spiral light came into my life, I was riding a roller coaster of    emotional crap that I could not understand why I was feeling the way I was emotionally. It was always a month before my birthday.  Sadness, depression, and a deep feeling of not being wanted unloved.  Well now I have the answer.  Spirals have been a part of my life since I could hold a pencil and draw.

Sometime people need to get the whole story before they run with half of the story.  Stop being CNN. So, will we every heal this relationship, it is hard to say.  All I have is love in my heart.    I noticed how many relationships came undone this year. I am not the only one who lost a good friend.  So, in the last week of  November of this year my spirit father Ciba  died of an Massive heart attack.  I just saw him and his wife  in late April, of this year.  What great food , laughter and fun we had.  This year when I visit Puerto Rico I really had a difficult   time  leaving.  My heart is always torn when I have to leave the island and submerge myself back into the present.  His death hit me hard in my heart. I felt  a part of me slip into silence. What was I going to do  without him in physical form,  I will miss his fatherly hugs and his kind words my home is your home.  My world is different now.  But I know he is up there helping to make things better for the people of his Taino tribe.    This was a very difficult year for me.

Sometime when I wake up in the morning , the world feels different.  Time is moving so fast.  The old timelines are fading away.  Oh! yes I know exactly what is happening on this planet.  What is happening to us all.   But one thing for sure for the year 2018 I will not allow an energy that is about blaming, shaming, guilting, shunning and creative lies to be aimed at me for others EGO driven GAIN.  No more!  My experience in some medicine groups has not always been for my highest good.  Sometimes you just have to leave and not be disrespected anymore.  I will always listen to CREATOR for my life journey messages.  May this Full Moon of January 1, 2018 bring in a new life energy for ALL.   Blessings